Abstract Realities…
“Abstract: relating to or denoting art that does not attempt to represent external reality rather seeks to achieve its effect using shapes, colours, and textures.”
- Oxford Dictionary
Abstract is not a concept that I’ve really been particularly familiar with before. Even long before I received a diagnosis as autistic, I found my intellectual identity in things that were concrete, ordered, logical and analytical.
Even as an artist… especially perhaps as a photographer or when drawing; I found myself drawn to that which is ‘real’, observable and relatable. I did so with my ever whimsical perspective but my attention to detail has always been explicit.
I’ve lately started exploring new types of watercolour paints in both colour and texture as well as using chemicals to create different results. But as anyone who has ever used watercolours knows there is an unpredictability that comes with them and you never quite know what you’re going to get.
I suppose there is still a methodical nature to my work, geometrical elements, patterns, botanical themes or underlying ideas.
But I suddenly find myself increasingly draw to that which is abstract- I find the abstraction soothing. And I find it relaxing to work outside the rigid preconceived boxes I tend to place myself within both as an artist and a person.
I feel like I should have a point. But I don’t except to say that I feel like the final year of my twenties is producing a different kind of art because it is no longer an escape from a fearful, painful place and more an expression of growth and learning and passion that has been absent throughout the many years of trauma that came before. I still love my florals and that’s evident in my work but I love looking at my art and seeing joy and celebration!
Perhaps as I slowly become more comfortable with who I am and how life is unfolding- despite bad days- or weeks, sometimes- there is HOPE on my page where tears were washed away with ink before.
Where before the only thing seen was a mask that hid (or exposed) my pain… I am able to leave beauty BEYOND the broken places instead of exclusively amongst them… So perhaps if my art reflects my changing external reality then my art is not so abstract after all?!? How's that for an abstraction?
